Friday, May 6

Rollercoaster Ride

The past two days have been characterized by extreme highs and lows, and I have a feeling that it will be this way until I say goodbye to the U.S.A. Yesterday, I had a major emotional breakdown without any provocation whatsoever. I honestly can’t say what caused me to start bawling uncontrollably while sitting in my car outside my mom’s hair salon. All I know is that I continued to cry and sob for the next 45 minutes, leaving me even more tired than I was when I first arrived at the salon.

Today, I woke up feeling good. Great, in fact; and Mama, Mons, and I set out on a morning walk bright and early. Sometime between finishing my walk, packing for Biff’s, and running errands, however, I became incredibly tired and grouchy yet again. I blame a mixture of things: stress, lack of sleep, restless sleep (when I do sleep), a crazy eating schedule, excitement… you get the point. On top of it all, I don’t deal with stress very well. By that, I mean, I don’t realized I’m stressed until it manifests itself as uncontrollable crying, a racing heartbeat, or the sudden urge to eat everything in sight, all three of which have happened in the past two days. My brain simply cannot cope.

In between all of this emotional nonsense, I did eat and get my hair did. 

Strawberry shake
Veggie sandwich with cherry tomatoes, carrot, and cucumber OTS
Getting our huuurr did.
I don't know where dinner went. I had just woken up, was incredibly groggy, and literally do not remember what it was... I think turkey and tortillas were involved...

Two over easy eggs on tortillas and a cup of strawberries. By this pic, I had already eaten almost all of the strawbs.
Snacktime: almond-raisin scone with tea. So English of me. I'm sure the Queen would approve my having the scone on a paper towel.
Rice cakes topped with cottage cheese and tomatoes and pickle, artichokes, and carrots OTS
Cappuccino courtesy Biff.
Naked burrito from Moe's with basically everything good on it.
On the bright side, today and tomorrow are going to be spent with my Biff, who I’ve dearly missed over the time I’ve been away from her. I don’t even want to think about how 8,000 miles away is going to feel.

I realize that I sound rather melancholic, which I am, but I’m also feeling very happy and eager to fly to my new home. I just have to accept the fact that the next week is going to be a crazy mix of contradicting emotions. Luckily, my loving family will be there to hold my hand every step of the way. God knows I’m going to need it.

On the bright side of things, I found out that I ended up with all A’s for the semester and a 3.7 cumulative GPA. How was this possible? I have no idea… It was a nice reprieve from my low spirits. You know what else always guarantees a cheerful mood?  Thoughts of seeing my future husband for the first time in 9 months. Now I know that I just have to channel those thoughts when I start feeling gloomy.

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