Wednesday, March 9

Dear Senior Thesis

Dear Senior Thesis,

Here’s the deal. I’ve decided to spend Spring Break at home to finish you off and now I’m sick. I’ve really been trying to ignore it and trudge through my usual routine. However, I woke up this morning not hungry, which, as you know, is completely out of the ordinary for me, and did not eat breakfast until almost 9 am.
Blueberry oats with 1/2 a banana
It was less-than-stellar, but due to my foggy state of mind, I wasn’t concerned.

Working on you for 3 hours did me no good. I did not appreciate how you teased me by first lengthening, and then shortening again as I tweaked you. You sapped my brain power, stealing all my lunch creativity. This was the result:
Chocolate banana protein shake with greenies
 I dry coughed my afternoon away with you constantly on my mind. If only I could just get you out of my head.

In an attempt to rid myself of thoughts of you, I made sweet potato fries that promised to be delish.
 Sadly, even though they tasted good, they were sorely lacking in the stiffness department. Had I felt well, inappropriate jokes would have ensued.
 Just FYI, my sickness has not yet improved, and I am seriously considering subsisting on tea, honey, and lemon tomorrow.  

Dinner is done and the kitchen is cleaned, and now here I am, about to work on you again. But before I begin, I have one question that, although I know will be rejected, I must ask anyway: Would you be ever so kind as to finish yourself?  

                                                 Your regretful author

P.S. I plan to be rid of you by tomorrow.

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